Wow! Was I whiney or what last week? Hormones are such a wonderful thing (NOT!). The overwhelming feelings of sadness, anger and yes, even relief have now subsided a bit and I'm a little clearer in my thinking.
DH took the news of me not being pregnant pretty well. He was actually relieved in a way, which kind of threw me off at first. He said he was "kinda glad" simply because he wouldn't have to worry about how the pregnancy was going while he was half a world away. This I can understand.
And quite honestly, with everything else going on I guess I am a little relieved not to be pregnant too. I was miserable most of the first trimester with my son. I can't imagine trying to move across the country while battling morning sickness AND 100+ degree temperatures at the end of June.
That still doesn't erase the ache every time I see a pregnant woman, knowing that it will be another year before I can even think about trying to conceive again. But dwelling on what I don't have, instead of the incredible blessing that is my son, is not going to get it for me any faster.
So instead I will cherish all the fun things my son and I will be able to do this coming year. I will take lots and lots of pictures for my DH and I will work on losing the weight I desparately need to lose. Being healthier can only help at this point. Starting in June I will be walking more and eating less chocolate/sweets/fat. Yes, chocolate is its own category with me. LOL! The nice thing is, when I move home my sister will be there and we can encourage each other in our weight loss efforts.
It feels a little weird to be making "resolutions" in mid year but for me the new year is starting July 1.
Now, if I can just pass my final exam tomorrow...
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3 comments:
Glad you are feeling better this week - GL on the final.
-JPup
GL on the final exam! I know you can do it! You have a bunch of challenges in front of you and I am sure you will face them and plow right through all of them!
I hope you did great on your exam! I am so excited you are graduating!!! YEAH!
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