Tonight's post is a tribute to Ryan David. Most everyone who reads this blog knows who he is, but for those who have stumbled across this blog and don't:
Ryan was born one year ago - August 9th, 2005. He was so loved by his mommy and daddy, but his time on earth was short. He passed away just two days later.
Ryan and his parents have come to hold a special place in my heart. Sher and Mike have been so open with those of us on the boards, sharing their joy in his impending birth and the horrible sadness at his passing. I appreciate their candor because it is a daily reminder to me to be grateful for the blessing of my little boy.
The other thing they have done is give me a little perspective on a family tragedy. Approximately 22 years ago (can it really be that long ago) my cousin Caitlin was born. She too had a congenital heart defect. Caity was not expected to survive more than a couple of days but she did. She fought long and hard for the 8 years she spent with us. I spent a few hours with her at the end but I never truly understood the pain my aunt and uncle must have been going through. Through Sherry I have come to have a better understanding, and respect, for my aunt and uncle and what they have had to overcome.
To Sherry and Mike, know I am thinking of you today and always. I send you all the strength and love I can.
To Ryan, the sweet little angel who I know is celebrating his birthday with his loved ones on the other side - including his buddy Thomas, Happy Birthday little man! You will never be forgotten.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Friday, August 04, 2006
Late Night Randomness
I finally heard from DH this afternoon. He made it overseas and was getting settled in. I'm glad his flight was uneventful. For some reason I was really nervous about it.
One of the great things about being home is that I have "workout buddies" again. My sisters are both trying to lose weight also and we've taken a pact to get together at least once a week and ride our bikes. We went for a nice long ride earlier in the evening. It was great! And the nice thing is my DS did really well for most of the ride. Last time he fussed with his helmet, didn't want to be in the trailer, and was generally a crank pot. Tonight I couldn't get his helmet on him fast enough, he was anxious to get in the trailer and held out until about 5 min from the cars before he got cranky. I'm hoping our ride next week will be the same, or even better.
The one thing my dad and step mother have in their house that I refused to have in mine is a scale. I stepped on it the first week we were here and was pleasently surprised that I hadn't gained any more weight since my last doctor's appt many months ago. I think I now know what my max body weight is! When I got on the scale today it says I've lost about 3 lbs. I'll take it - at least for now. I'd like to lose about 20 times that if I can. I'll take 10 times that by this time next year, just in time for my 20th high school reunion. OMW, can it really be 20 years already?!
One of the great things about being home is that I have "workout buddies" again. My sisters are both trying to lose weight also and we've taken a pact to get together at least once a week and ride our bikes. We went for a nice long ride earlier in the evening. It was great! And the nice thing is my DS did really well for most of the ride. Last time he fussed with his helmet, didn't want to be in the trailer, and was generally a crank pot. Tonight I couldn't get his helmet on him fast enough, he was anxious to get in the trailer and held out until about 5 min from the cars before he got cranky. I'm hoping our ride next week will be the same, or even better.
The one thing my dad and step mother have in their house that I refused to have in mine is a scale. I stepped on it the first week we were here and was pleasently surprised that I hadn't gained any more weight since my last doctor's appt many months ago. I think I now know what my max body weight is! When I got on the scale today it says I've lost about 3 lbs. I'll take it - at least for now. I'd like to lose about 20 times that if I can. I'll take 10 times that by this time next year, just in time for my 20th high school reunion. OMW, can it really be 20 years already?!
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Nerves
I got good news this morning as I was engaging in some retail therapy. I got the job I applied for! I'm excited and a little nervous, as expected. Though the nerves are as much for my DS as they are for me. I now need to put him back into daycare at least part time.
I know he will love it. I'm sure he misses the interaction with other kids and the structure of routine. I'm just nervous about finding a place that's as good as the one he was in in Arizona. I actually have a lead on a couple places. I need to go check them out ASAP. I'll be making calls tomorrow to set up appointments.
As for the job, I have no idea what my hours will be like and I admit I'm a bit nervous about the fact I'll be working mostly with school age children. But it will be a welcome change from working with adults who act like school age children!
I know he will love it. I'm sure he misses the interaction with other kids and the structure of routine. I'm just nervous about finding a place that's as good as the one he was in in Arizona. I actually have a lead on a couple places. I need to go check them out ASAP. I'll be making calls tomorrow to set up appointments.
As for the job, I have no idea what my hours will be like and I admit I'm a bit nervous about the fact I'll be working mostly with school age children. But it will be a welcome change from working with adults who act like school age children!
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
The Time Is Here
DH will soon be on his way over seas. The doctor cleared him yesterday - his knee is healed and he's ok to go. This is a relief, and yet not.
I think the reality of this is finally hitting DH. With all that is going on in the world he's finally getting nervous about going. I've been anxious about this for a while now. It turns my stomach in knots to even think about what could happen. So, in true Scarlett O'Hara fashion, I don't really think about it.
I know sometimes it's hard for people to understand why we decided DH should volunteer for this mission. Sometimes I don't understand it myself. There is the practical side of it (the money will put us into a house at the end of all this). But there is something more. A determination to help prevent further attacks on the US...maybe. A hope that we are keeping our son, and any other future children we may have, safe... definitely.
Some would argue that this action/war in Iraq is not justified. Being the "bleeding heart liberal" my father thinks I am, I would have to say I agree. I'm not blind to the fact that our country was lied to. But some how, some way, I can understand my DH's need to do this mission.
Maybe it's my upbringing that allows me to get past the distrust I have for the "brass" and the decisions they are making. My dad was career Navy. He went in during the Vietnam war and spent 20 years of his life serving. He doesn't talk about that time very much, like so many men and women who served. My mother was also in the Navy. Before her was my grandfather in WWII. I know, if he were still alive, he would also understand DH's need to do his duty. He felt that need too. He never really talked about what he did during WWII, only that his ship ran missions across the Atlantic Ocean. My grandfather was a humble man - those missions we later found out were very dangerous, running supplies and escorting other ships. This is just the surface of my family's history of service in the military. As you can tell I'm very proud of all the members of my family who have served and sacrificed for our country. I can honestly say, if my own son comes to me in 17 years and says "Mom, I want to join the military." I would be proud of him. That doesn't mean I won't cry and I won't be afraid for him, but I would support him in his decision. And I'd send my dad (a former recruiter) with him to the recruiter's office! LOL!
I worry about what this mission could do to DH mentally and emotionally. He's a big guy, but he's very sensative. Especially when it comes to children. Don't get me wrong, he's no pushover. Working in corrections as long as he has will take the polish off anyone's ideals! I just hope this mission won't be too hard on him.
Regardless of which way you fall on this issue, please say a prayer for all the soldiers, sailors and airmen who are far from home. They are doing their job, protecting us, and they do their job very well.
I think the reality of this is finally hitting DH. With all that is going on in the world he's finally getting nervous about going. I've been anxious about this for a while now. It turns my stomach in knots to even think about what could happen. So, in true Scarlett O'Hara fashion, I don't really think about it.
I know sometimes it's hard for people to understand why we decided DH should volunteer for this mission. Sometimes I don't understand it myself. There is the practical side of it (the money will put us into a house at the end of all this). But there is something more. A determination to help prevent further attacks on the US...maybe. A hope that we are keeping our son, and any other future children we may have, safe... definitely.
Some would argue that this action/war in Iraq is not justified. Being the "bleeding heart liberal" my father thinks I am, I would have to say I agree. I'm not blind to the fact that our country was lied to. But some how, some way, I can understand my DH's need to do this mission.
Maybe it's my upbringing that allows me to get past the distrust I have for the "brass" and the decisions they are making. My dad was career Navy. He went in during the Vietnam war and spent 20 years of his life serving. He doesn't talk about that time very much, like so many men and women who served. My mother was also in the Navy. Before her was my grandfather in WWII. I know, if he were still alive, he would also understand DH's need to do his duty. He felt that need too. He never really talked about what he did during WWII, only that his ship ran missions across the Atlantic Ocean. My grandfather was a humble man - those missions we later found out were very dangerous, running supplies and escorting other ships. This is just the surface of my family's history of service in the military. As you can tell I'm very proud of all the members of my family who have served and sacrificed for our country. I can honestly say, if my own son comes to me in 17 years and says "Mom, I want to join the military." I would be proud of him. That doesn't mean I won't cry and I won't be afraid for him, but I would support him in his decision. And I'd send my dad (a former recruiter) with him to the recruiter's office! LOL!
I worry about what this mission could do to DH mentally and emotionally. He's a big guy, but he's very sensative. Especially when it comes to children. Don't get me wrong, he's no pushover. Working in corrections as long as he has will take the polish off anyone's ideals! I just hope this mission won't be too hard on him.
Regardless of which way you fall on this issue, please say a prayer for all the soldiers, sailors and airmen who are far from home. They are doing their job, protecting us, and they do their job very well.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Stop Asking Why Already
Why is it that people who shouldn't have babies are able to get one so easily?
This, my friends, is the $64,000 question of the day.
I just got back from taking DH to the airport. On the way there he called a friend of his from home. Now this guy is a nice guy, don't get me wrong. He has two kids from his first marriage. When his marriage went down the drain he hooked up with someone from his work. I think she also has a couple of kids from a previous marriage. In addition to this, J has a granddaughter who is about my son's age (maybe a little older) that he is supporting.
Now, the divorce between J and his first wife was less than pleasent (as if these things could ever be pleasent). He's not married to the gal from work - yet. I know this in and of itself is not reason to think they would be bad parents.
Back in April DH, DS and I had gone to visit the IL and DH's friends, including J. At one point the subject of babies came up and J mentioned that he and his girlfriend decided to NTNP. I immediately thought "Why?!" but managed NOT to say it out loud. At that point DH and I had been TTC actively for 9 or 10 cycles with no success.
Fast forward back to tonight, DH called J to see how things were going and found out that J and his girlfriend are in fact PG - approx 3.5 mos pregnant. By my calculations they got pg about the time we saw them last!
Call me shallow, call me a bitch, whatever. I just could not bring myself to congratulate them tonight. It's not fair that they were able to so quickly achieve what I, and a number of you, are unable to. I try not to judge people by their situations but for crying out loud. This is not the healthiest of relationships.
Sigh! I guess I'm just bitter that we've had to put so much on hold this year. Or maybe it's just the fact that AF decided to rear her ugly head today, three days early. Whatever it is I hope my mood lifts in the morning. It's been a long day.
This, my friends, is the $64,000 question of the day.
I just got back from taking DH to the airport. On the way there he called a friend of his from home. Now this guy is a nice guy, don't get me wrong. He has two kids from his first marriage. When his marriage went down the drain he hooked up with someone from his work. I think she also has a couple of kids from a previous marriage. In addition to this, J has a granddaughter who is about my son's age (maybe a little older) that he is supporting.
Now, the divorce between J and his first wife was less than pleasent (as if these things could ever be pleasent). He's not married to the gal from work - yet. I know this in and of itself is not reason to think they would be bad parents.
Back in April DH, DS and I had gone to visit the IL and DH's friends, including J. At one point the subject of babies came up and J mentioned that he and his girlfriend decided to NTNP. I immediately thought "Why?!" but managed NOT to say it out loud. At that point DH and I had been TTC actively for 9 or 10 cycles with no success.
Fast forward back to tonight, DH called J to see how things were going and found out that J and his girlfriend are in fact PG - approx 3.5 mos pregnant. By my calculations they got pg about the time we saw them last!
Call me shallow, call me a bitch, whatever. I just could not bring myself to congratulate them tonight. It's not fair that they were able to so quickly achieve what I, and a number of you, are unable to. I try not to judge people by their situations but for crying out loud. This is not the healthiest of relationships.
Sigh! I guess I'm just bitter that we've had to put so much on hold this year. Or maybe it's just the fact that AF decided to rear her ugly head today, three days early. Whatever it is I hope my mood lifts in the morning. It's been a long day.
Friday, July 28, 2006
My Own Little World
Why does the world have to push its way into my little reality? I finally manage to convince myself that things will be ok with DH going overseas and things start to heat up over there again. And to have it intrude in my own city...
I wish I could block out the bad things that are happening. It makes me sick to think that I can't even make life plans beyond the next 6 mos. And that is pushing it. The uncertainty is crushing at times.
Aren't you so glad I'm back with my oh-so-cheery blog entries;-)
As my son would say "Thank you so much Mom-mom!"
I wish I could block out the bad things that are happening. It makes me sick to think that I can't even make life plans beyond the next 6 mos. And that is pushing it. The uncertainty is crushing at times.
Aren't you so glad I'm back with my oh-so-cheery blog entries;-)
As my son would say "Thank you so much Mom-mom!"
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Things in Threes
OK, so I'm a total blogging slacker. LOL! So much for posting daily. It was a noble goal...
You know how they say "bad" things happen in threes? Well, we've reached that quota with DH. First was the wallet, then the broken hand. Then, two days before he was scheduled to leave overseas DH fell and split his knee open!
He's got 12 stitches in his knee. The doctors won't release him to go until the wound is completely healed. Apparently the sand over there is really fine and gets into everything no matter how well protected it is. Add to that some nasty bacteria and such and the conditions are not good for someone with a gash from one side of his knee to the other.
On the bright side, he's home on convalescent leave until this coming Sunday. It's been great having him around even though he's not as helpful as he could be if his hand weren't in a brace.
We've been taking advantage of him being home, and me not working yet, and doing a ton of family stuff. The zoo, the water and amusement park, all kinds of fun stuff. My son is really enjoying having daddy home.
OK, I'd better get going. I've got some grocery shopping to do. We start seriously working on potty training next week once our schedule gets back to normal. I'm the potty training woosy of all time. LOL! Now I have no more excuses, it has to get done.
You know how they say "bad" things happen in threes? Well, we've reached that quota with DH. First was the wallet, then the broken hand. Then, two days before he was scheduled to leave overseas DH fell and split his knee open!
He's got 12 stitches in his knee. The doctors won't release him to go until the wound is completely healed. Apparently the sand over there is really fine and gets into everything no matter how well protected it is. Add to that some nasty bacteria and such and the conditions are not good for someone with a gash from one side of his knee to the other.
On the bright side, he's home on convalescent leave until this coming Sunday. It's been great having him around even though he's not as helpful as he could be if his hand weren't in a brace.
We've been taking advantage of him being home, and me not working yet, and doing a ton of family stuff. The zoo, the water and amusement park, all kinds of fun stuff. My son is really enjoying having daddy home.
OK, I'd better get going. I've got some grocery shopping to do. We start seriously working on potty training next week once our schedule gets back to normal. I'm the potty training woosy of all time. LOL! Now I have no more excuses, it has to get done.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Settling In
Sorry it's been almost two weeks since I checked in. We did in fact make it to Seattle. DS handled the trip like a champ! Of course we all now know the dialogue and lyrics in the movie Chicken Little by heart, lol.
The first week here we did as much as we could as a family before DH had to report back to the base. It was great. I'll have to load up some pics to share with you all.
This week has been a vain attempt at unpacking and organizing all the stuff we brought with us. I fear that some things got left in storage in Arizona. The most important bits - the screws and stuff from DS's bed - I did manage to find. We need them to set up the bunk for my cousins to use next month when they visit. I also got the final application materials taken over to the museum I applied at.
Oh, and an update on the continuing saga of the missing wallet...DH found out on Tuesday this week that he did break his hand. Funny how that will happen when your fist meets the wall at a high rate of speed and velocity! I don't think it would have been so bad if he hadn't insisted on moving alot of the heavy stuff by himself. Luckily it's not so bad and the doctors cleared him to return to duty.
I know I've been a bad board member lately, being MIA and all. I apologize to everyone. This full time Mommy gig is fun but hard. I knew it would be challenging, thanks to the insite from the SAHM on the board.
Speaking of, I'd better head for bed now. DS will be up before I know it. Sleep tight!
The first week here we did as much as we could as a family before DH had to report back to the base. It was great. I'll have to load up some pics to share with you all.
This week has been a vain attempt at unpacking and organizing all the stuff we brought with us. I fear that some things got left in storage in Arizona. The most important bits - the screws and stuff from DS's bed - I did manage to find. We need them to set up the bunk for my cousins to use next month when they visit. I also got the final application materials taken over to the museum I applied at.
Oh, and an update on the continuing saga of the missing wallet...DH found out on Tuesday this week that he did break his hand. Funny how that will happen when your fist meets the wall at a high rate of speed and velocity! I don't think it would have been so bad if he hadn't insisted on moving alot of the heavy stuff by himself. Luckily it's not so bad and the doctors cleared him to return to duty.
I know I've been a bad board member lately, being MIA and all. I apologize to everyone. This full time Mommy gig is fun but hard. I knew it would be challenging, thanks to the insite from the SAHM on the board.
Speaking of, I'd better head for bed now. DS will be up before I know it. Sleep tight!
Monday, July 03, 2006
Notes from the Road
I'm checking in from the road. We stopped for the night in Redding, CA last night. For those of you unfamiliar with the most direct route from Phoenix to Seattle, we are in No. CA just a couple hours north of Sacramento. It's so beautiful up here. We are getting ready to head into my favorite part of the drive.
My son has done really well on this drive so far (knock on wood). The dvd player in the van really helps. He hasn't caught on to what is going on yet I don't think. The next day or two should be interesting.
I'm exhausted. We didn't get done cleaning the apartment until noon on Saturday. Ugh! I never realized we had so much shit!! A 1000 sq ft apt holds alot of stuff! LOL! Luckily the complex was nice about giving us the extra time.
Well, the troops are beginning to move around so I'd better get ready to hit the road. "See" you all in Seattle.
My son has done really well on this drive so far (knock on wood). The dvd player in the van really helps. He hasn't caught on to what is going on yet I don't think. The next day or two should be interesting.
I'm exhausted. We didn't get done cleaning the apartment until noon on Saturday. Ugh! I never realized we had so much shit!! A 1000 sq ft apt holds alot of stuff! LOL! Luckily the complex was nice about giving us the extra time.
Well, the troops are beginning to move around so I'd better get ready to hit the road. "See" you all in Seattle.
Friday, June 30, 2006
Update on Thing #1
Well, the good news is, the wallet was where we thought. The "pickup" found it in her back seat and is sending it to Seattle. It will be there when we get there. Whew! That's a relief.
As for his flight, well DH managed to get on his airplane and is headed home even as we speak. Apparently it IS possible to board an aircraft without picture id. I just don't want to know the details of the search he must have endured to get throught security;-)
So here I'll plug Continental Airlines, and say well done to their customer service dept. They've made a stressful situation less so!
As for his flight, well DH managed to get on his airplane and is headed home even as we speak. Apparently it IS possible to board an aircraft without picture id. I just don't want to know the details of the search he must have endured to get throught security;-)
So here I'll plug Continental Airlines, and say well done to their customer service dept. They've made a stressful situation less so!
Thing #1
So the first big "thing that could go wrong" has happened with this move.
Imagine this.... you are quietly sleeping after a day of rigorous packing when you are suddenly awakened by a phone call at 1:45 am. On the other end of the phone is a man. A man who has lost his WALLET!
You have now entered the twilight zone..........
Yup! You heard me right. DH lost his wallet. Apparently he left it in the car of the person one of his friends picked up at the restaurant last night.
No driver's license, no military id, no credit cards or debit card and a 9 am flight do NOT mix.
So, after calling me in a panic this morning DH is now re-cleaning his room (which was torn apart in the search for said wallet) and I am here chatting with you because I can't get back to sleep.
After calling the airline to try to reschedule his flight and discovering he may still be able to get on the plane if he has his orders, gives them his right arm and left testicle, DH embarked on a frantic search for a ride to the airport. You see the military, in it's infinite wisdom, decided that the last bus to the airport should leave at 3 am - just about the time DH was calling me for the first time. Luckily for us, and unluckily for the poor schlub up at 3 am their time, he managed to wrangle a ride to the airport that is not a$100 cab fare.
So now I get to wait and see if they really will let him on the plane or if he's going to have to find a ride back to base so he can get his ID re-issued. This doesn't even address the issue of the fact that all the flights out of Gulfport (and surrounding areas) are full!
Stay tuned! I'm sure it's going to get more interesting.
Imagine this.... you are quietly sleeping after a day of rigorous packing when you are suddenly awakened by a phone call at 1:45 am. On the other end of the phone is a man. A man who has lost his WALLET!
You have now entered the twilight zone..........
Yup! You heard me right. DH lost his wallet. Apparently he left it in the car of the person one of his friends picked up at the restaurant last night.
No driver's license, no military id, no credit cards or debit card and a 9 am flight do NOT mix.
So, after calling me in a panic this morning DH is now re-cleaning his room (which was torn apart in the search for said wallet) and I am here chatting with you because I can't get back to sleep.
After calling the airline to try to reschedule his flight and discovering he may still be able to get on the plane if he has his orders, gives them his right arm and left testicle, DH embarked on a frantic search for a ride to the airport. You see the military, in it's infinite wisdom, decided that the last bus to the airport should leave at 3 am - just about the time DH was calling me for the first time. Luckily for us, and unluckily for the poor schlub up at 3 am their time, he managed to wrangle a ride to the airport that is not a$100 cab fare.
So now I get to wait and see if they really will let him on the plane or if he's going to have to find a ride back to base so he can get his ID re-issued. This doesn't even address the issue of the fact that all the flights out of Gulfport (and surrounding areas) are full!
Stay tuned! I'm sure it's going to get more interesting.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Second Guessing
This whole move has been a tremendous source of guilt for me. I find myself wondering if we are doing the right thing, at least as far as my son is concerned.
I hate what it is doing to him emotionally. He's really showing signs of being stressed about this whole thing and I feel like I'm not doing enough to help him through it.
This morning he insisted on taking Ojo (his bear) with us to school. He NEVER takes her out of the house except when we are going on a trip. And even then he only wants to hold her on the airplane.
And then I think about how much he's going to miss his friends and teachers at school. It literally brings me to tears.
I talk to him about the fact we will be leaving and going to stay with Grandpa and Grandma. How he'll get to see his cousin and aunts and uncle. But I know he doesn't fully understand and I worry how he's going to adjust to a new house and new school. I've tried to come up with creative ways to help him adjust but somehow they don't feel like they are enough.
Perhaps I'm over thinking this, but it didn't feel like it this morning when my son begged to take his Ojo with us to the car.
I hate what it is doing to him emotionally. He's really showing signs of being stressed about this whole thing and I feel like I'm not doing enough to help him through it.
This morning he insisted on taking Ojo (his bear) with us to school. He NEVER takes her out of the house except when we are going on a trip. And even then he only wants to hold her on the airplane.
And then I think about how much he's going to miss his friends and teachers at school. It literally brings me to tears.
I talk to him about the fact we will be leaving and going to stay with Grandpa and Grandma. How he'll get to see his cousin and aunts and uncle. But I know he doesn't fully understand and I worry how he's going to adjust to a new house and new school. I've tried to come up with creative ways to help him adjust but somehow they don't feel like they are enough.
Perhaps I'm over thinking this, but it didn't feel like it this morning when my son begged to take his Ojo with us to the car.
Monday, June 26, 2006
Am I really making progress?
I wish I could keep up my postings the way I'd intended. It's just I don't feel I have much to say these days, that's new and interesting at least.
My son and I had a good visit with one of my sisters. She came to help me get some stuff moved that I couldn't do by myself. It was a busy morning on Saturday but we managed to get everything accomplished. I even got most of my shredding taken care of yesterday! Woohoo!
The only thing is, as I look around the apartment I feel like I've still got a long way to go. I'm going to make a run this afternoon at lunch to pick up yet more boxes and drop off two suitcases full of clothes at the consignment shop. Today starts the chores of packing up my son's room and my room. I need to see more boxes filled so I feel like I'm accomplishing something besides making myself crazy. We won't even go to the topic of what my kitchen looks like!
Yet again I can see that this packing situation is getting to my son. He now feels the need to carry a huge armload of his favorite cars with us everywhere we go. It's mildly irritating to me because he has little arms and it really is a huge load of cars. But I know that he's feeling unsettled and the cars help him feel more secure so I try not to let it get to me when I have to dig for his harness buckles every time I go to buckle him in the car seat.
My sister did make an interesting suggestion yesterday. She asked if I was going to hire a maid service to clean my apt for me. I hadn't thought about it until she mentioned it. I might look into it and see what it would cost. It might be easier than trying to do it all myself on Friday!
Oh, and I splurged a little at the swap meet this weekend. My son and I went yesterday after dropping my sister off at the airport. There is this toy my DH and I keep saying we are going to buy for our son. It's a track that you can lay out in various ways and the cars that are on it go by themselves. I made the mistake of letting my son watch it for a while yesterday and he pitched a fit about having to leave "my cars, my cars". It was only $10, about half the cost at the mall, so I bought it and we will open it when we get to my dad's house. Yet another form of bribery...
My son and I had a good visit with one of my sisters. She came to help me get some stuff moved that I couldn't do by myself. It was a busy morning on Saturday but we managed to get everything accomplished. I even got most of my shredding taken care of yesterday! Woohoo!
The only thing is, as I look around the apartment I feel like I've still got a long way to go. I'm going to make a run this afternoon at lunch to pick up yet more boxes and drop off two suitcases full of clothes at the consignment shop. Today starts the chores of packing up my son's room and my room. I need to see more boxes filled so I feel like I'm accomplishing something besides making myself crazy. We won't even go to the topic of what my kitchen looks like!
Yet again I can see that this packing situation is getting to my son. He now feels the need to carry a huge armload of his favorite cars with us everywhere we go. It's mildly irritating to me because he has little arms and it really is a huge load of cars. But I know that he's feeling unsettled and the cars help him feel more secure so I try not to let it get to me when I have to dig for his harness buckles every time I go to buckle him in the car seat.
My sister did make an interesting suggestion yesterday. She asked if I was going to hire a maid service to clean my apt for me. I hadn't thought about it until she mentioned it. I might look into it and see what it would cost. It might be easier than trying to do it all myself on Friday!
Oh, and I splurged a little at the swap meet this weekend. My son and I went yesterday after dropping my sister off at the airport. There is this toy my DH and I keep saying we are going to buy for our son. It's a track that you can lay out in various ways and the cars that are on it go by themselves. I made the mistake of letting my son watch it for a while yesterday and he pitched a fit about having to leave "my cars, my cars". It was only $10, about half the cost at the mall, so I bought it and we will open it when we get to my dad's house. Yet another form of bribery...
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Catching Up
The hell that was the software demos is now over, thank goodness.
Now all that's left for me to do is to train my replacement, finish packing, move the rest of the furniture into storage, keep my son from freaking out, give the apt a thorough once over with the cleaning products I've been dutifully stockpiling over the last few weeks, and somewhere in the midst of all this I need to sleep.
Sleep has been a luxury lately it seems. No, I'm not staying up all hours packing. I can't get anything else packed until I get the kitchen table moved out. I'm just not sleeping well. I'm sure it's the stress, but it sucks all the same.
And with the stress comes the inevitable cold. That's what my body does when I get too stressed out. I would really rather skip that part if you don't mind, for a couple of reasons. 1) It will make the drive that much less bareable and 2) it could potentially delay my cycle. I've got a very narrow window of opportunity with DH coming home next week. I really need for AF to show! And of course we all know what stress does to the body to begin with. Sigh!
I'm in a no win situation here, aren't I.
Oh, and if your local news hasn't been covering it, the high country in AZ is still on fire. I feel so bad for the people living in the Sedona area. It's one of my favorite places to visit.
I've also realized that I need to not watch CNN right now. I just can't imagine what the families of the two soliders who were killed yesterday are going through. I really don't want to imagine it. It's hard enough when any soldier is killed or wounded but for them to have suffered like they did... It just makes my blood run cold, and my heart ache for their mothers.
Now all that's left for me to do is to train my replacement, finish packing, move the rest of the furniture into storage, keep my son from freaking out, give the apt a thorough once over with the cleaning products I've been dutifully stockpiling over the last few weeks, and somewhere in the midst of all this I need to sleep.
Sleep has been a luxury lately it seems. No, I'm not staying up all hours packing. I can't get anything else packed until I get the kitchen table moved out. I'm just not sleeping well. I'm sure it's the stress, but it sucks all the same.
And with the stress comes the inevitable cold. That's what my body does when I get too stressed out. I would really rather skip that part if you don't mind, for a couple of reasons. 1) It will make the drive that much less bareable and 2) it could potentially delay my cycle. I've got a very narrow window of opportunity with DH coming home next week. I really need for AF to show! And of course we all know what stress does to the body to begin with. Sigh!
I'm in a no win situation here, aren't I.
Oh, and if your local news hasn't been covering it, the high country in AZ is still on fire. I feel so bad for the people living in the Sedona area. It's one of my favorite places to visit.
I've also realized that I need to not watch CNN right now. I just can't imagine what the families of the two soliders who were killed yesterday are going through. I really don't want to imagine it. It's hard enough when any soldier is killed or wounded but for them to have suffered like they did... It just makes my blood run cold, and my heart ache for their mothers.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Am I Old Fashioned?
I can't believe it's been almost 2 weeks since I regaled you all with my oh so witty ramblings. RL has definitely moved into high gear both at work and at home. I haven't forgotten about this blog, so never fear.
My biggest observation over the last 10 days or so is that I must be more old fashioned than I thought. I didn't realize that it's ok to be a complete and total ass to your co-workers in a meeting - speaking to them in the rudest manner possible, talking about totally unrelated things to someone and not even trying to conceal the fact that I'm not talking about the meeting topic, and doing paperwork instead of paying attention and then completely bringing said meeting to a grinding halt when I ask about something the presenter just covered (and so much more) are apparently all ok!
Or maybe I just have my standards set too high... Whatever the case this is the kind of behavior I've had to witness first hand since late last week. It makes all day meetings go that much slower, that's for sure.
On the home front, two more weeks and counting. My packing is going slowly but I am getting alot of the clutter cleared out. I've got a mountain of shredding to do. I just hope my little shredder doesn't die on me before I'm done!
My biggest observation over the last 10 days or so is that I must be more old fashioned than I thought. I didn't realize that it's ok to be a complete and total ass to your co-workers in a meeting - speaking to them in the rudest manner possible, talking about totally unrelated things to someone and not even trying to conceal the fact that I'm not talking about the meeting topic, and doing paperwork instead of paying attention and then completely bringing said meeting to a grinding halt when I ask about something the presenter just covered (and so much more) are apparently all ok!
Or maybe I just have my standards set too high... Whatever the case this is the kind of behavior I've had to witness first hand since late last week. It makes all day meetings go that much slower, that's for sure.
On the home front, two more weeks and counting. My packing is going slowly but I am getting alot of the clutter cleared out. I've got a mountain of shredding to do. I just hope my little shredder doesn't die on me before I'm done!
Friday, June 02, 2006
Hot...Hot...Hot
That's become my theme song, not because I'm what you would consider "hot" or "a hottie", but because it's like a flocking oven!
OK, so you are thinking "Um, you live in Arizona! Hello! Desert = HOT!" And sure, I suppose I deserve the sarcasm. But it's not going to keep me from complaining about the 110 degree heat today. It's not supposed to be this hot so early in the summer. All I can say is chalk up one more reason for being glad I am moving! I love Arizona, I really do, just not between the months of June and October.
And while I'm complaining about the summer, I might add a complaint about the idots who started the 5 or 6 wildfires now burning the northern part of Arizona. What part of RED FLAG WARNING do you not understand?! There has been no snow or rain in the upper 2/3 of the state at all this winter. Does that not say to you you might want to be a little careful when you are shooting target practice (as in NOT shooting target practice) or camping or having a cookout or smoking outside?! I mean come on people! A little common sense if you please.
It's going to be a loooooonnnnnnggggg summer.
OK, so you are thinking "Um, you live in Arizona! Hello! Desert = HOT!" And sure, I suppose I deserve the sarcasm. But it's not going to keep me from complaining about the 110 degree heat today. It's not supposed to be this hot so early in the summer. All I can say is chalk up one more reason for being glad I am moving! I love Arizona, I really do, just not between the months of June and October.
And while I'm complaining about the summer, I might add a complaint about the idots who started the 5 or 6 wildfires now burning the northern part of Arizona. What part of RED FLAG WARNING do you not understand?! There has been no snow or rain in the upper 2/3 of the state at all this winter. Does that not say to you you might want to be a little careful when you are shooting target practice (as in NOT shooting target practice) or camping or having a cookout or smoking outside?! I mean come on people! A little common sense if you please.
It's going to be a loooooonnnnnnggggg summer.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Hormones from Hell
I'm beginning to dread the days leading up to AF. I swear to God, if I didn't know better I would really think I was pregnant. The last three or four days have been nothing but emotional ups and downs that rival the best of a pregnancy induced tantrum.
The whole trip to the zoo was one thing but I've done nothing but sob since yesterday afternoon. I'm holding it together at work only because work provides a perfect opportunity to divert my attention for an hour here and there.
Stress, maybe (ok most likely), the downside of the insanity that was my life the previous 6 weeks, ok I'll by that, but mix in those wonderful (?!) PMSing hormones and look out world. The train wreck is a-comin'. Seriously, can you see that pinpoint of light barreling down at you from the horizon? That is a real live breakdown threatening to happen on your computer screen;-) Can't say I didn't warn you... breathe in... breathe out... breathe in... breathe out....
And why the hell isn't spell check working any more?!
The whole trip to the zoo was one thing but I've done nothing but sob since yesterday afternoon. I'm holding it together at work only because work provides a perfect opportunity to divert my attention for an hour here and there.
Stress, maybe (ok most likely), the downside of the insanity that was my life the previous 6 weeks, ok I'll by that, but mix in those wonderful (?!) PMSing hormones and look out world. The train wreck is a-comin'. Seriously, can you see that pinpoint of light barreling down at you from the horizon? That is a real live breakdown threatening to happen on your computer screen;-) Can't say I didn't warn you... breathe in... breathe out... breathe in... breathe out....
And why the hell isn't spell check working any more?!
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
The Zoo
The best part of a three day weekend is getting to spend some extra time with my son. I just love when we get that extra 24 hrs to do something fun together. This past Memorial Day weekend was especially nice considering how crazy weekends have been lately.
Sunday I dedicated to nothing but fun - no packing, no cleaning, no errands, just fun. So we packed ourselves up, slathered on the sun screen and headed for the zoo. It's a modest little zoo we have in Phoenix, dedicated to preservation and desert environment species mostly. No hippos, no polar bears, no penguins but fun just the same.
My son has reached the stage where he does not want to be riding in his stroller most of the time. I still bring it, especially to the zoo, because there are some hills and his little legs usually get tired about half way through. The stroller is definitely easier than carrying him, especially in 100+ degree heat!
So, we arrive and say hello to the turtles and fishies at the entrance and make our way in. First stop - the carousel. Who knew that a 2.5 year old would walk all the way around a carousel and pick the dolphin to ride on. Never mind the fact he was one of about 3 kids on the ride and could have picked just about any animal he wanted! LOL! It had to be the dolphin.
It was a wonderful day. We got to see one of the new cheetahs and (finally) the baby oranguatan! She's about 4 mos old now and so cute. And my son had a blast playing in the water fountain to take the edge off what was shaping up to be a really warm day. It took him a few minutes to get used to the water spraying up from the floor but once he did he really had a great time running from one part of the fountain to another.
The only thing that bothered me during our 2 hours at the zoo was all the pregnant bellies. Really! That's it. I mean just because every time I turned around there was another one walking by... It was like I had PGPS (Pregnancy GPS) or something! About half way through our walk I realized how much I was bothered by them. I really thought I was ok with the possibility of never being pregnant again. Guess I was wrong. I don't think I'll ever be ok with it.
Sunday I dedicated to nothing but fun - no packing, no cleaning, no errands, just fun. So we packed ourselves up, slathered on the sun screen and headed for the zoo. It's a modest little zoo we have in Phoenix, dedicated to preservation and desert environment species mostly. No hippos, no polar bears, no penguins but fun just the same.
My son has reached the stage where he does not want to be riding in his stroller most of the time. I still bring it, especially to the zoo, because there are some hills and his little legs usually get tired about half way through. The stroller is definitely easier than carrying him, especially in 100+ degree heat!
So, we arrive and say hello to the turtles and fishies at the entrance and make our way in. First stop - the carousel. Who knew that a 2.5 year old would walk all the way around a carousel and pick the dolphin to ride on. Never mind the fact he was one of about 3 kids on the ride and could have picked just about any animal he wanted! LOL! It had to be the dolphin.
It was a wonderful day. We got to see one of the new cheetahs and (finally) the baby oranguatan! She's about 4 mos old now and so cute. And my son had a blast playing in the water fountain to take the edge off what was shaping up to be a really warm day. It took him a few minutes to get used to the water spraying up from the floor but once he did he really had a great time running from one part of the fountain to another.
The only thing that bothered me during our 2 hours at the zoo was all the pregnant bellies. Really! That's it. I mean just because every time I turned around there was another one walking by... It was like I had PGPS (Pregnancy GPS) or something! About half way through our walk I realized how much I was bothered by them. I really thought I was ok with the possibility of never being pregnant again. Guess I was wrong. I don't think I'll ever be ok with it.
Friday, May 26, 2006
A Surprise
So I was just searching for something in my "book bag" and I came across a little white box with a white ribbon on it. Treasure! It was the table favor from my cousin's wedding last weekend. I'd completely forgotten it was there! Inside the pretty little box were two Godiva hearts - one milk chocolate, one dark chocolate. Aaahhhhhh! Just what a PMSing woman needs to tide her over until lunch time:-)
Perchance to Dream
I must not be handling the stress of moving as well as I think I am.
Last night I had a dream that I was riding in a van (mini-van) with my parents, who aren't married to each other any more, my sister, BIL and their son, my son and my youngest sister. We were driving down the freeway, the sky was black and in the distance I could see a couple of tornados. At first I couldn't tell if they were actually on the ground but then my dad (who was driving) started to speed up. We were trying to make it to a hotel where we would find safety. I kept thinking just get inside to a hallway, no windows or doors. We finally pulled into (what in my mind was) a Holiday Inn. Specifically the one that is in the town I grew up in. Of course it didn't look like a Holiday Inn, more like an older roadside motel, but we had to get out of the car as the tornados were closing in on us. I distinctly remember hearing my dad say "Leave the bags in the trunk. I'll get them later". Of course me, being the pragmatist I am, had to get the diaper bag out with us, just in case. No one else was around and all the windows were open in the rooms. I woke up before we actually found a safe place, and before the tornados caught up with us.
So, being curious I did some quick searches online this morning about dreams. This is what I found on tornados. Of course I visited several sites and they all said basically the same thing. I'm no expert on dream interpretation and I'm not angry or being overly agressive about things but, given the state of my life the last couple of months, I would hazzard a guess that the tornados actually represent the stress I'm begining to feel.
Let's just hope I can continue to outrun any other tornados I see coming my way!
Last night I had a dream that I was riding in a van (mini-van) with my parents, who aren't married to each other any more, my sister, BIL and their son, my son and my youngest sister. We were driving down the freeway, the sky was black and in the distance I could see a couple of tornados. At first I couldn't tell if they were actually on the ground but then my dad (who was driving) started to speed up. We were trying to make it to a hotel where we would find safety. I kept thinking just get inside to a hallway, no windows or doors. We finally pulled into (what in my mind was) a Holiday Inn. Specifically the one that is in the town I grew up in. Of course it didn't look like a Holiday Inn, more like an older roadside motel, but we had to get out of the car as the tornados were closing in on us. I distinctly remember hearing my dad say "Leave the bags in the trunk. I'll get them later". Of course me, being the pragmatist I am, had to get the diaper bag out with us, just in case. No one else was around and all the windows were open in the rooms. I woke up before we actually found a safe place, and before the tornados caught up with us.
So, being curious I did some quick searches online this morning about dreams. This is what I found on tornados. Of course I visited several sites and they all said basically the same thing. I'm no expert on dream interpretation and I'm not angry or being overly agressive about things but, given the state of my life the last couple of months, I would hazzard a guess that the tornados actually represent the stress I'm begining to feel.
Let's just hope I can continue to outrun any other tornados I see coming my way!
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